Better Late Than Never
by Sgamer82
Summary: Ai Haibara would have gladly avoided the ceremony altogether. When Ayumi drags her along anyway, Haibara is struck by odd thoughts and impulses that reveal an important moment in the life of Shiho Miyano. Written for Poirot Cafe's Themed Writing Contest #29: Festival


**_Detective Conan  
_** **Better Late Than Never  
** by  
Sgamer82

 _How did I let myself get talked into this?_ Ai Haibara asked herself for what she knew wasn't actually the hundredth time. Even as she asked again why she was out on this chilly afternoon in the literal middle of November, the answer to her question tugged at her hand.

"C'mon, Ai-chan." Ayumi Yoshida pulled Haibara along to the top of the shrine's steps. Behind them, Ayumi's parents and Professor Agasa worked their own, less energetic way up.

Haibara wished she could be angry with Ayumi. Wished she could just tell the other girl she wanted no part in any of this. The reason she couldn't do any such thing was because Ayumi, in making sure Haibara was included, had sincerely been trying to help. So instead Ai Haibara found herself being along pulled by her friend so they could participate together in Shichi-Go-San, the day that celebrated children who turned seven, five, and three.

Whether she wanted to or not.

* * *

It had started innocently enough. Earlier in the month, in preparation for today, Ayumi's grandmother had sent her a kimono. She had worn it when she had been seven, as had Ayumi's mother. Ayumi had been ecstatic at having her turn come. Not long after, another package arrived at the Yoshidas' doorstep. That package had come from Ayumi's _other_ grandmother and _also_ contained a kimono for the approaching holiday.

Fortunately for the Yoshidas' family harmony, when Ayumi's father had called his mother to inform her that, while the gift was appreciated, she'd been beaten to the punch, the woman had taken it in good spirits. All she'd asked was a few pictures of Ayumi wearing the kimono for her photo album. Ayumi was happy to oblige, since the kimono was just as nice as the one her maternal grandmother had sent. Somewhere along the way, Ayumi's mother had made the comment that it seemed a shame to let the other kimono simply go to waste. Ayumi, ever eager to help, had known exactly how to solve that problem and called her best friend.

"Ai-chan, my grandma sent me a kimono!" Ayumi had said before Haibara could even get out a greeting.

"I know Yoshida-san." Haibara had smiled, amused by her friend's excitement and, as yet, unaware of what awaited her. "You invited me over to model it, already."

"Not that one, the other one," Ayumi insisted.

"You have another kimono?" Haibara asked.

"Yes. My grandma sent it to us."

"She sent you two?" Haibara heard an uncharacteristic sound of exasperation on the other end of the line.

"I told you, the _other_ one!"

It took Haibara a few seconds before she puzzled it out.

"Your other grandmother sent you a kimono, also?"

"That's what I said," Ayumi replied. "That means we have two. But since I don't need two you can borrow the other one!"

Haibara's eyes widened as she realized where her friend was going just a moment too late.

"That's wholly unnecessary, Yoshida-san," Haibara told her.

"But didn't you say you couldn't come because didn't have a kimono?" Ayumi asked.

That _had_ been her excuse, yes. Specifically, she had claimed that sudden necessary repairs for Professor Agasa's car meant they didn't have the money to get one. She'd also added that the Professor had failed to arrange a rental kimono early. Given Shichi-Go-San marked the rite of passage of seven-year-old girls wearing an _obi_ belt with a kimono for the first time, it had seemed a solid enough evasion. The Professor had agreed to go along with the story, as well.

"I did," Haibara said after a moment. "I appreciate the gesture, Yoshida-san, but I could never accept something like that."

"Why not?"

 _Think fast, Shiho,_ Haibara told herself.

"Well, um, you said your grandmother sent you that kimono, right? Doesn't that mean it's probably an heirloom like the one your maternal grandmother sent you? Would it be right for me to wear it if I'm not family?"

Ayumi didn't have an answer for that. The line went quiet for a few seconds before Haibara heard a loud "Dad!" followed by conversation Ayumi's phone didn't pick up. After several minutes Ayumi came back.

"Dad's Grandma said it's fine," Ayumi said upon her return.

"Already?" Haibara asked, the question startled out of her.

"Yeah, my dad was already on the phone and asking as soon as I went to call you," Ayumi explained.

"They clearly knew what you had in mind..." Haibara said flatly.

"I know," Ayumi said. "It's weird how they do that sometimes."

With her excuse beaten and no way to refuse the Yoshidas' generosity without being ungrateful, Haibara found herself at the Yoshidas' apartment the morning of the big day being dressed in that extra kimono. Haibara had never had much experience with kimonos, so Ayumi and her mother had helped her with putting it on. Ayumi herself was already set to go by the time Haibara and Professor Agasa had arrived. That had provided a glimpse into Haibara's immediate future as it was obvious Ayumi's mother had spared no effort in this respect. Along with the formal kimono, Ayumi's hair had been decorated with clips and hairpins and a small amount of make-up had even been applied to her face. Haibara was prepped in much the same way. The primary difference was that Haibara's longer hair was done up in a coiffure.

Haibara had never been the type to apply the words "cute" or "beautiful" to herself. Yet when she was placed in front of a mirror to get a look at the end result, she had come very close. Everyone else, the Professor included, hadn't hesitated for a moment. Haibara was pleased enough that she decided it was even worth tolerating whatever comments Kudo would make when Ayumi inevitably shared the details and photographic evidence of today.

 _It's no bathrobe, that's for sure,_ Haibara had mused. Her expression became confused as she wondered what had brought on _that_ thought.

* * *

Ayumi's progress suddenly jerked to a halt when she and Haibara reached the top of the steps. She looked back to see that Haibara was now actively pulling against Ayumi's efforts to drag her along. Haibara pointed behind them.

"Let's not get separated," she told Ayumi. "Especially not with the crowd."

Like most families, the Yoshidas had planned their trip to the shrine on the weekend before Shichi-Go-San, since the holiday itself fell during the school week. By Haibara's count, "most" in this instance looked like at least a dozen families, not counting their group. Among the children, about half seemed to be in the three-year-old range. There were several and small boys and girls dressed in traditional formal wear. There were only a few boys in the five-year-old column, dressed in hakama. With Haibara and Ayumi included, seven-year-old girls in kimonos were in the middle ground. Parents and siblings stood around with the children dressed in a mix of Japanese and Western formal clothing.

As they waited for the adults to reach them, Ayumi noticed and waved at a few girls from their class. Most waved back, though one had been too busy getting her little brother to stop picking his nose to notice them.

 _"Shiho, get your thumb out of your mouth."_

Haibara blinked and shook her head as the voice of Akemi Miyano suddenly rang in her head. She found herself staring at her right hand, still clasped in Ayumi's.

"Ai-chan?" Ayumi had noticed the odd behavior. "Am I hurting your hand?"

"No, you're fine," Haibara replied. "Just an idle thought," then she muttered, "they seem to be a trend today..."

Ayumi tilted her head but before she could ask about it her parents had arrived and began scolding her for having run so far ahead of them when she'd been told to stay close.

Ayumi's depression over being told off lasted only as long as it took for her mother to announce they were taking pictures before the main ceremony. Ayumi happily posed for pictures, throwing out as many peace signs as she could. She had even convinced Haibara to do the same, and found no end of amusement when Haibara's photos had her holding up three, four, even five fingers instead of the typical two. Haibara herself couldn't explain that impulse, only play it off as a whim.

The strange thoughts passing through Haibara's mind continued when the children were gathered together for the shrine's priest to say some prayers over them. Haibara tried to be attentive, but again Akemi's voice was in her mind. This time, she sounded unclear, and tended to stop or stutter. At the same time, images of rows of wooden benches, crosses, and stained glass went through Haibara's mind.

That left Haibara more confused than ever. The intellectually Spartan nature of her upbringing had not included much in the way of religion; Shinto, Christian, or otherwise. So why did the image of a Christian looking church fill her head while she was in the midst of a Shinto ceremony?

* * *

With the prayers and formalities completed, more photos were taken and Ayumi's parents brought the girls each a bag decorated with cranes and turtles. Inside were _chitose-ame_ , sticks of candy colored either red or white. Ayumi enjoyed hers, but when she looked at Ai, her friend had an odd look on her face as she ate her own.

"You don't like it, Ai-chan?" Ayumi asked.

"Hm?" was the most coherent response Haibara could manage with her mouth full.

"It's good," Haibara said after removing the candy. Then she grinned. "Hoping to get it if I didn't want it, Yoshida-san?"

"N-no! Not at all!" Ayumi averted her eyes. "You were making a strange face, so I was wondering."

Ai regarded her _chitose-ame_ for a moment.

"It's not that I dislike the candy." Ai shrugged. "Quite the opposite. It's just..."

"Just what?" Ayumi asked when Ai didn't continue.

"Just... for some reason I keep thinking it should taste like peppermint. It makes just as little sense to me," Ai added when she saw the confused look on Ayumi's face.

"Are you all right, Ai-chan?" Ayumi asked. "You've been acting weird all day."

"I'm fi-" Ai started angrily, then stopped. She cut off the automatic answer and sighed. "I don't know," she admitted. "From the moment we got ready at your apartment, I've been having these strange thoughts I can't quite understand. On top that, everything we've done today has felt familiar but... not."

Ayumi had never seen Ai looking so uncertain. It was not a sight she liked.

"I know what is supposed to be happening, yet I keep thinking that something _else_ should be," Haibara went on, not quite able to stop herself now that she had begun. "We're in a Shinto shrine but I keep thinking of a Christian church. I'm so certain that candy I've never had before is supposed to have a different flavor. I keep hearing my sister's voice say things that don't make sense, in one instance telling me to take my thumb out of my mouth when I haven't sucked my thumb since I was thr-"

Haibara's eyes went wide as she stopped mid-sentence.

" _Three..._ "

"Ai-chan?" Ayumi was sounding worried now.

"Three years old..." Haibara was completely ignoring Ayumi now. "I haven't sucked my thumb since I was _three years old..._ Onee-chan... she..."

Ayumi didn't know what to think as she watched her friend suddenly begin crying. At first, Ai was smiling as she cried, but after a few seconds her smile became a frown and she began sobbing.

"Professor!" Ayumi wrapped her arms around Ai as she cried out. Professor Agasa and Ayumi's parents all turned away from their conversation to see Ayumi desperately hugging Ai as she sobbed inconsolably.

* * *

 _They were at the church, but it wasn't like when Nanny brought them. Nanny wasn't here, it was just Shiho and Akemi. It wasn't Sunday, or Shiho didn't_ think _it was. She judged mostly by the fact she and Akemi weren't dressed in Sunday clothes more than on any knowledge of calendars. Instead they were dressed in the most colorful bathrobes Akemi could find. Also the Father who talked on Sundays wasn't talking. He stood by the wall watching them. He was smiling, so Shiho hoped they weren't in trouble. Akemi had just sat Shiho down and turned to start whatever she was going to do, only to frown and cross her arms when she saw her sister._

 _"Shiho, get your thumb out of your mouth."_

 _"Sorry, Akemi," Shiho said as she obeyed._

 _"Ah." Akemi held up a finger. "We're speaking Japanese, remember?"_

 _"I'm sorry, Onee-chan," Shiho corrected herself in Japanese. "Onee-chan, why are we in bathrobes?"_

 _Akemi smiled and shook her head._

 _"Shiho, Shiho, Shiho, We are not wearing bathrobes. We are wearing kimonos, like in that book I showed you."_

 _Shiho nodded. She remembered the book. She'd thought the kimonos were pretty. With that settled, Akemi stood over Shiho and began to say a prayer. Akemi stopped and started as she spoke, frowning as she struggled to say certain words and muttering about if a certain part was said right. She also stopped to again extract toddler thumb from toddler mouth; to Shiho's relief, Akemi gave up on that after only two tries. She counted._

 _Despite Akemi telling her it was important to listen, Shiho didn't really hear much of what Akemi said. Her three-year-old attention span simply couldn't do it. What Shiho had heard was Akemi telling her she wasn't a baby anymore, which she already knew perfectly well, and something about growing her hair._

 _After that Akemi collected a tote bag she brought with her. Shiho recalled Akemi sewing on it, decorating it with patches of turtles and birds. Akemi gave the bag Shiho told her to look in it. Shiho's face lit up when she saw a package of straight candy canes inside. Akemi called them "thousand year candy". That made Shiho nervous until Akemi explained they weren't_ actually _a thousand years old._

 _Akemi took out a camera and had Shiho pose for pictures. She made Shiho hold out her fingers line she was counting to two, ignoring her little sister's insistence that she could count much higher. The Father helped take some pictures of the sisters together._

 _After everything was finished, Akemi took Shiho's hand, wincing as she realized too late how sticky even one candy cane could render a three-year-old's hand, and took her to get changed back into regular clothes before they walked home._

 _"Are we gonna do this again, Onee-chan?" Shiho asked around her candy cane._

 _"Someday," Akemi promised. "But not for a long time. We did the 'san' part of Shichi-Go-San today. The 'go' part is for boys, but the 'shichi' part is for girls. That means the next part for you is when you're seven."_

 _"But that'll be forever!" Shiho whined._

 _"I know," Akemi replied. "But I promise when you're seven years old we'll do this again. In fact, I'll take you to Japan and we'll do it right!"_

 _"Really?"_

 _"Yep! I promise."_

 _That promise was never kept._

 _As Shiho Miyano reached school age, and her intellect became more and more apparent, the Organization had already begun its plans to replace her parents with her. She was placed into accelerated learning programs that kept her apart from her less exceptional sister. By the time Shiho's seventh birthday came and went, she had forgotten Akemi's promise entirely and Akemi, assuming she remembered, had gotten no chance to honor it herself due to only seeing Shiho a few days or weeks at a time, none of which had been in November._

* * *

Haibara didn't speak again until long after she was back in the Yoshidas' apartment. She had neither fallen asleep nor otherwise lost consciousness. Instead, after she had finished crying Haibara had simply shut down and ignored everything around her. She was aware that the Professor had carried her back to the apartment and that Ayumi and her mother had helped her back into her street clothes, but Haibara herself had simply gone through the motions asked of her. She did not respond to any attempts to talk to her about what had happened. Even when Ayumi's father invited them to stay for dinner, she ate only because the food was placed in front of her and the _itadakimasu_ and _gochisousama_ before and after the meal were purely automatic.

The still active part of her mind knew she was worrying everybody, but she could not muster the will to speak up until it was nearly time to go home. Professor Agasa was just opening the door when Haibara tugged on his coat. Being the most conscious thing she'd done all evening, the Professor took notice and closed the door.

"Ai-kun?" he asked. Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at Haibara.

"I'm sorry..." Haibara said quietly. Before anyone could ask what had happened or assure her she had little to apologize for, Haibara continued. "I'm sorry for making you worry about me all night. I'm sure you're wondering just what happened. Why I... well... broke down..."

Everyone nodded.

"I remembered something..." Haibara said. "My older sister tried to hold Shichi-Go-San for me when I was three."

Haibara took a deep breath before continuing. Much of that to was brace herself, to push back the emotions threatening to once again spill out. The rest was buying time, going over what she was about to say, double checking for anything that people other than the Professor should not know.

"Back then, Onee-chan and I lived in America, which isn't exactly known for its Shinto shrines..."

From there, Haibara told her audience everything she could remember from her memory. She excluded only minor details such as the fact she had been called "Shiho" instead of "Ai", and that the events she recalled had occurred fifteen years ago instead of four.

A part of her feared Ayumi's parents would be offended. That they would become angry at the childish mockery of such a significant ceremony. It was only a part, however. One only needed to take a good look at Ayumi to see that the Yoshidas would know Haibara's story for what it was: A young girl's attempt at giving her little sister a piece of her heritage she would have otherwise missed.

She looked at everyone as she finished. The Professor was pointedly looking away from everyone. Ayumi's father didn't react obviously, but Haibara saw the emotion in his eyes. Ayumi's mother was clearly trying not to cry. Ayumi herself was not even bothering to try. Looking at her, Haibara realized she herself wasn't trying very hard either as fresh tears started welling up. It didn't surprise her. Despite her best efforts, thinking of Akemi almost always brought her emotions closer to the surface than she liked.

"A... Anyway..." Haibara's voice was husky as she reined those emotions back. "Onee-chan promised we'd do it when I turned seven years old, but... but she couldn't keep her promise. Even though you couldn't have known you were doing it... how could you? _I_ didn't even know... you fulfilled Onee-chan's wish."

Haibara threw herself forward in a deep bow.

"Thank you for that," Haibara told them, saying the words as loudly and clearly as she could. "Thank you for today!"

Haibara was forced out of her bow by Ayumi rushing forward to hug her. Ayumi was squeezing tightly. Enough to actually hurt. Haibara didn't resist. Looking at the adults in the room, it was clear from their expressions that Ayumi's actions spoke for them, too.

"Thank you, Yoshida-san."

"You're welcome, Ai-chan," Ayumi replied. Then, after a moment. "I won't tell Conan-kun about the parts where you cried."

Haibara brought her arms around Ayumi and hugged back.

"I appreciate that, Yoshida-san."


End file.
